Brains in jail

 
An old farmer wrote to his son in prison: “this year I wont be able to plant potatoes because I cant dig the field. I know if you were here you would help me”

The son wrote back:” Dad don’t even think of digging the field because that’s where I buried the money I stole”

Police read the letter and the very next day the whole field was dug by police looking for the money but nothing was found. The next day the son wrote again: “ Now plant your potatoes dad; it’s the best I can do from here…”

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a really bad day

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.

Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor... man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."

"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."

"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

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NEVER TRUST WOMEN

The real estate boss got a hot new secretary, and he decided to put some moves on her.

But within a few weeks, he is feeling displeased at the way she is working: not caring, coming to work late, and so on.

Finally, he pulls her aside, and has a little talk with her. "Listen, baby, we may have gone to bed together a few

times, but who said you could start coming in late and slacking off?"

The secretary's reply, "My lawyer."

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car names and their meanings

Who said car names don't have meaning......check these out

 

FIAT: Failure in Italian Automotive  Technology
FORD: For Only Rough Drivers
HYUNDAI: Hope you Understand Nothing's Drivable & Inexpensive
VOLVO: Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
PORSCHE: Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything
OPEL: Old People Enjoying Life
TOYOTA: The One you Only Trust, Always
HONDA: Hanged Over, Now Driving Away
BMW: Brings Me Women

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